Glossary MM
Rimming — giving
Also called · analingus · giving a rim job
At a glance
- In one line
- Using your mouth and tongue on a partner's anus, external contact only.
- Usually looks like
- A partner face-down or on their back with hips raised, a few minutes of licking and pressure, often with a hand involved too.
- Gear needed
- None. A dental dam or a cut-open condom is the barrier option; flavoured lube is a common addition.
- Talk about first
- Showering beforehand, whether a barrier is used, and how long you are actually up for.
Rimming as the giving partner means using your lips and tongue on a partner's anus: broad flat licking, pointed pressure at the opening, or pushing the tongue slightly inside. It is usually part of a longer sequence, often as a warm-up before fingers or penetration, and it is rarely taken through to orgasm on its own.
Position determines most of what is available, since a partner on hands and knees, lying face down with hips raised, or on their back with legs up each change the angle, how much load falls on your neck and jaw, and whether your hands are free to do anything else at the same time. Beyond that the variables are duration, tongue pressure, and what hygiene you want in place first, which is a reasonable thing to ask for.
Low scores here are usually about the sensory side and the health risk rather than about intimacy, and that is a considered position rather than squeamishness. High scores tend to come from the taboo, from how strongly partners react, and from the closeness of it. A middling score often means yes after a shower and no otherwise, which is a legitimate answer.
What a score means here Rimming — giving
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0
Hard no: your mouth does not go there, showered or not, barrier or not.
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1–33
1-33: you would do a few seconds of it as a favour, and you would rather not.
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34–66
34-66: fine when a partner is freshly showered and it is part of something larger.
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67–99
67-99: you want to do it, at length, and you like the reaction it produces.
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100
100: this is the act you want, and you would happily spend most of a session on it.
Rating it
A low score usually reflects hygiene or health concerns rather than distaste for the person; a high score means it is something you want as a regular part of sex rather than a favor granted occasionally.
Common misconceptions
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If they showered it is completely clean.
In practiceA shower removes visible residue but not gut bacteria, and hepatitis A, giardia and shigella all transmit this way. Barriers, not washing, are what reduce the risk.
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Rimming is basically just anal foreplay.
In practiceIt stays external and is a distinct act with its own appeal, which is why plenty of people want to give it and have no interest in anal penetration in either direction.
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Mouthwash afterwards handles the infection risk.
In practiceMouthwash does nothing against the faecal-oral pathogens that matter here. The measures that work are a dental dam and hepatitis A vaccination.
Worth knowing
This carries a real risk of gut pathogens such as E. coli, shigella, and giardia, and of hepatitis A, which vaccination prevents. A dental dam or a cut-open condom substantially reduces contact, and you should wash before moving to any other oral or genital contact.
About this item Frequently asked
Rimming — giving — questions people ask
what is rimming and what does analingus involve
Rimming, or analingus, means using your mouth and tongue on a partner's anus. It is external: licking, sucking, and pressure around and against the opening, sometimes with a tongue pushed slightly in. It sits separately from anal fingering and anal sex because it is oral, and the entire external area is densely nerve-supplied, which is why it produces a strong reaction for many people who dislike anything penetrative. Sessions are typically short, since it is awkward on the neck and jaw to sustain.
how do you give a rim job for the first time
Have your partner shower first, then position them so your neck is not doing all the work: face-down with hips raised on a pillow, or on their back with knees pulled up. Start broad and slow around the whole area rather than going straight for the opening, and use flat tongue pressure before anything pointed. Add a hand elsewhere, since rimming alone is often not enough on its own. Decide about a dental dam before you start rather than mid-act. Five minutes is a lot; nobody expects a long stretch.
rimming vs anal fingering, which is more of a jump for the giver
They are different jumps. Anal play giving is mechanical, keeps your hands in charge, and can be done with gloves that remove the mess question entirely, but it goes internal and carries a real risk of tearing if rushed. Rimming stays outside and cannot injure anyone, but it puts your mouth in direct contact with gut bacteria and carries an infection risk that gloves cannot solve. Most people find one clearly easier than the other, and which one it is varies. Squeamishness and interest are separate axes here.
how do i score rimming giving when the hygiene is my only issue
Score the appetite with your hygiene conditions assumed met, and put the conditions into the conversation. A 0 is a hard no and means you would not do it under any circumstances. If a freshly showered partner and a possible barrier make it something you actively want, the number belongs in the upper half of the 1 to 100 scale, not the bottom. Reserve low scores for genuinely not being interested in the act. The score reflects wanting, and preconditions are separate information a partner needs anyway.
can you get sick from rimming and how do you reduce the risk
Yes: hepatitis A, giardia, shigella, E. coli and intestinal parasites all transmit by mouth-to-anus contact, and so can herpes, HPV, gonorrhoea, chlamydia and syphilis. Showering reduces residue but does not remove bacteria, and mouthwash does nothing useful. The measures that work are a dental dam or a condom cut open and laid flat, hepatitis A and B vaccination, and not doing it when either of you has a gut infection or diarrhoea. Wash hands afterwards, and never move from anus to vulva without a barrier change, since that is a direct route to a urinary infection.
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